Silked Stalkings are on the move
Kernaled Killers on Death Rows
Sentenced to a Field of Screams
that harbors more than just a Murder of Crows;
You can Shuck and jive
to try and stay alive
but you best beware
– the Nefarious Niblets and the Criminal Creams
are sure to make you shutter and stop,
and you’ll wish you had more than a Stick of Butter
and a surefire way to make them . . . . POP!!!
Well, we’ve been a bit under the weather so this is all we managed this week. I know, its a bit corny. Looks like a really bad Scooby Doo Villain doesn’t he? As for the song we’re sharing; well, it is equally perplexing. Back in our youth when we thought it extremely important to find the Christian alternative to Metallica I stumbled across this song on a sampler tape. It had the thrashy type riffs but definitely more of a punk rock edge. With the production being a bit muddy and the vocals going so fast – I had a hard time trying to decipher the lyrics. “What the heck is a ‘Hellcorn’?” Ultimately, I wound up buying the Crucified album on cassette. (Although not really what we listen to now – it did have some good tunes for its genre and is considered a classic among many Christian rock fans.) Of course, one of the first things that I did was open the lyrics sheet to see what this Hellcorn was all about. To my dismay, the lyrics were printed so small I couldn’t read them – even back in the late 80’s when my vision was clearer. I actually scoured the Bible looking for references of evil corn or some mention of hell and corn in a single verse trying to solve this lyrical labyrinth. After awhile, I decided that maybe these guys just didn’t like corn. My wife hates corn. I could see her screaming, “Hellcorn!!!”
Some years later I bought a reissue of the album on CD. The lyrics were legible!!! Finally, the mystery would be solved!!!
So, as it turns out; the guys apparently caught some flack for being a Christian Thrash band and among their hagglers were a group of guys that liked the Children of the Corn movie. Well, the Crucified were not about to be bullied around; so they wrote this punk rock battle hymn in retaliation. Good to know that corn isn’t evil, right? ….Now, where did she hide my corn cob holders? =P